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She sobbed and she sighed, she lamented and
For of sorrow brimful was her cup;
She swooned, and I think she'd have fallen down
and died
If Captain MacBride
Had not been by her side,
With the gardener; they both their assistance
And managed to hold her up.
But, when she “comes to,”
O, 'tis shocking to view
The sight which the corpse reveals!
Sir Thomas's body,
It looked so odd, he
Was half eaten up by the eels!
His waistcoat and hose, and the rest of his clothes,
Were all gnawled through and through!
And out of each shoe
An eel they drew;
And from each of his pockets they pulled out two!
And the gardener himself had secreted a few,
As well we may suppose;
For when he came running to give the alarm
He had six in the basket that hung on his arm.

Good Father John

Was summoned anon;

Holy water was sprinkled,

And little bells tinkled,

And tapers were lighted,

- And incense ignited,

And masses were sung, and masses were said,
All day, for the quiet repose of the dead,
And all night no one thought about going to bed.

But Lady Jane was tall and slim, And Lady Jane was fair, And, ere morning came, that winsome dame Had made up her mind,-or what's much the Same, Had thought about—once more “changing her name.” And she said, with a pensive air, To Thompson the valet, while taking away, When supper was over, the cloth and the tray,+ “Eels a many I’ve ate; but any So good ne'er tasted before!— They're a fish, too, of which I’m remarkably fond.—

Go, pop Sir Thomas again in the pond;
Poor dear!--HE'LL CATCH Us SOME MORE!”


I had a love in soft south land,
Beloved through April far in May;

He waited on my lightest breath,

And never dared to say me nay.

He saddened if my cheer was sad,
But gay he grew if I was gay;

We never differed on a hair,
My yes his yes, my nay his nay.

The wedding hour was come, the aisles
Were flushed with sun and flowers that day;

I pacing balanced in my thoughts:
“It’s quite too late to think of nay.”—

My bridegroom answered in his turn,
Myself had almost answered “Yea:”

When through the flashing nave I heard
A struggle and resounding “Nay.”

Bridesmaids and bridegroom shrank in fear,
But I stood high who stood at bay:

“And if I answer yea, fair sir,
What man art thou to bar with nay?”

He was a strong man from the north,
Light-locked, with eyes of dangerous grey;

“Put yea by for another time
In which I will not say thee nay.”

He took me in his strong white arms,
He bore me on his horse away

O'er crag, morass, and hair-breadth pass,
But never asked me yea or nay.

He made me fast with book and bell,
With links of love he makes me stay:

Till now I’ve neither heart nor power
Nor will nor wish to say him nay.



A monk, when his rites sacerdotal were o'er, In the depth of his cell with his stone-covered floor, Resigning to thought his chimerical brain, Once formed the contrivance we now shall explain; But whether by magic's or alchemy's powers We know not; indeed, 'tis no business of ours.

Perhaps it was only by patience and care,
At last, that he brought his invention to bear.
In youth 'twas projected, but years stole away,
And ere 'twas complete he was wrinkled and
But success is secure, unless energy fails;
And at length he produced THE PHILOSOPHER's

“What were they?” you ask. You shall presently see; These scales were not made to weigh sugar and tea. O no; for such properties wondrous had they, That qualities, feelings, and thoughts they could weigh, Together with articles small or immense, From mountains or planets to atoms of sense.

Naught was there so bulky but there it would lay,
And naught so ethereal but there it would stay,
And naught so reluctant but in it must go:
All which some examples more clearly will show.

The first thing he weighed was the head of Voltaire,

Which retained all the wit that had ever been there.

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