Thou never shouldst love woman like to me.
Vio. And all those sayings will I over-swear;
And all those swearings keep as true in soul
As doth that orbed continent the fire
That severs day from night.

Duke.

Give me thy hand;

And let me see thee in thy woman's weeds.

Vio. The captain that did bring me first on shore Hath my maid's garments: he upon some action

Is now in durance, at Malvolio's suit,

A gentleman, and follower of my lady's.

Oli. He shall enlarge him: fetch Malvolio hither: And yet, alas, now I remember me,

They say, poor gentleman, he's much distract.

Re-enter CLOWN with a letter, and FABIAN.

A most extracting frenzy of mine own
From my remembrance clearly banish'd his.
How does he, sirrah?

Clo. Truly, madam, he holds Belzebub at the stave's end as well as a man in his case may do : has here writ a letter to you; I should have given 't you to-day morning, but as a madman's epistles are no gospels, so it skills not much when they are delivered.

Oli. Open 't, and read it.

Clo. Look then to be well edified when the fool delivers the madman. [Reads] By the Lord,

madam,'

Oli. How now! art thou mad?

Clo. No, madam, I do but read madness: an your ladyship will have it as it ought to be, you must allow Vox.

280

290

300

the

304. Vox, the proper tone of voice.

Oli. Prithee, read i' thy right wits.

Clo. So I do, madonna; but to read his right wits is to read thus: therefore perpend, my princess, and give ear.

Oli. Read it you, sirrah.

[To Fabian.

Fab. [Reads] By the Lord, madam, you wrong 310 me, and the world shall know it: though you have put me into darkness and given your drunken cousin rule over me, yet have I the benefit of my senses as well as your ladyship. I have your own letter that induced me to the semblance I put on; with the which I doubt not but to do myself much right, or you much shame. Think of me as you please. I leave my duty a little unthought of and speak out of my injury.

THE MADLY-USED MALVOLIO.'

Oli. Did he write this?

Clo. Ay, madam.

Duke. This savours not much of distraction.

Oli. See him deliver'd, Fabian: bring him
[Exit Fabian.

hither.

My lord, so please you, these things further thought

on,

To think me as well a sister as a wife,

One day shall crown the alliance on 't, so please you,
Here at my house and at my proper cost.

Duke. Madam, I am most apt to embrace your
offer.

[To Viola] Your master quits you; and for your service done him,

So much against the mettle of your sex,
So far beneath your soft and tender breeding,
And since you call'd me master for so long,
Here is my hand: you shall from this time be

307. perpend, reflect.

328. apt, ready. 329. quits you, sets you free.

320

330

Your master's mistress.

Oli.

A sister! you are she.

Re-enter FABIAN, with MALVOLIO.

Duke. Is this the madman ?

Mal. Lady, you have. Pray you, peruse that

letter.

You must not now deny it is your hand:
Write from it, if you can, in hand or phrase;
Or say 'tis not your seal, not your invention:
You can say none of this: well, grant it then
And tell me, in the modesty of honour,
Why you have given me such clear lights of favour,
Bade me come smiling and cross-garter'd to you,
To put on yellow stockings and to frown
Upon Sir Toby and the lighter people;
And, acting this in an obedient hope,
Why have you suffer'd me to be imprison'd,
Kept in a dark house, visited by the priest,
And made the most notorious geck and gull
That e'er invention play'd on? tell me why.

Oli. Alas, Malvolio, this is not my writing,
Though, I confess, much like the character:
But out of question 'tis Maria's hand.
And now I do bethink me, it was she

First told me thou wast mad; then camest in smiling,

And in such forms which here were presupposed
Upon thee in the letter. Prithee, be content :

340

350

This practice hath most shrewdly pass'd upon thee; 360 340. Write from it, write unlike it.

351. geck, dupe, fool

But when we know the grounds and authors of it,
Thou shalt be both the plaintiff and the judge

Of thine own cause.

Fab.

Good madam, hear me speak,
And let no quarrel nor no brawl to come
Taint the condition of this present hour,

Which I have wonder'd at. In hope it shall not,
Most freely I confess, myself and Toby
Set this device against Malvolio here,
Upon some stubborn and uncourteous parts
We had conceived against him: Maria writ
The letter at Sir Toby's great importance;
In recompense whereof he hath married her.
How with a sportful malice it was follow'd,
May rather pluck on laughter than revenge,
If that the injuries be justly weigh'd
That have on both sides pass'd.

370

Oli. Alas, poor fool, how have they baffled thee! Clo. Why, 'some are born great, some achieve greatness, and some have greatness thrown upon them.' I was one, sir, in this interlude; one Sir 380 Topas, sir; but that's all one. 'By the Lord,

fool, I am not mad.' But do you remember? Madam, why laugh you at such a barren rascal? an you smile not, he's gagged:' and thus the whirligig of time brings in his revenges.

Mal. I'll be revenged on the whole pack of you. [Exit. Oli. He hath been most notoriously abused. Duke. Pursue him, and entreat him to a peace: He hath not told us of the captain yet: When that is known and golden time convents,

370. conceived against him, observed and resented in him. 371. importance, importunity. 374. pluck on, call forth.

390

377. baffled, ignominiously

chastised.

391. convents, is convenient,

suits.

A solemn combination shall be made

Of our dear souls. Meantime, sweet sister,
We will not part from hence. Cesario, come;
For so you shall be, while you are a man;
But when in other habits you are seen,
Orsino's mistress and his fancy's queen.

Clo. [Sings]

[Exeunt all, except Clown.

When that I was and a little tiny boy,
With hey, ho, the wind and the rain,
A foolish thing was but a toy,

For the rain it raineth every day.

But when I came to man's estate,

With hey, ho, &c.

'Gainst knaves and thieves men shut their gate,

For the rain, &c.

But when I came, alas! to wive,

With hey, ho, &c.

By swaggering could I never thrive,
For the rain, &c.

But when I came unto my beds,

With hey, ho, &c.

With toss-pots still had drunk en heads,

For the rain, &c.

A great while ago the world begun,

With hey, ho, &c.

But that's all one, our play is done,

And we'll strive to please you every day.

398. and; used expletively

in popular songs; cf.—

He that has and a little tiny wit, K. Lear, iii. 2. 74; and Oth.

iii. 2. 92 (Q2).

400. toy, trifle.

[Exit.

412. toss-pots, drunkards.

400

410