to method, abused the other with the titles of rogue, villain, bearskin-man, and the like. Whereupon fatisfaction was demanded and accepted; fo, forth the major marched, commanding his adverfary to follow him. To a most spacious room in the sheriff's house, near the place of quarrel, they come, where, having due regard to what you have lately published, they refolved not to fhed one another's blood in that barbarous manner you prohibited, yet, not willing to put up affronts without fatisfaction, they stripped, and in decent manner fought full fairly with their wrathful hands. The combat lafted a quarter of an hour, in which time victory was often doubtful, and many a dry blow was ftrenuously laid on each fide, till the major, finding his adversary obstinate, unwilling to give him further chastisement, with most shrill voice cried out, "I am fatisfied; enough!" Whereupon the combat ceased, and both were friends immediately.'

"Thus the world may fee how neceffary it is to encourage thofe men, who make it their business to instruct the people in everything necessary for their prefervation. I am informed a body of worthy citizens have agreed on an address of thanks to you for what you have writ on the foregoing subject, whereby they acknowledge one of their highly-esteemed officers preferved from death.

"Your humble fervant,

"A. B."

I fear the word "bear" is hardly to be understood among the polite people; but I take the meaning to be, that one who enfures a real value upon an imaginary thing, is faid to fell a bear, and is the fame thing as a promise among courtiers, or a vow between lovers. I have writ to my brother to haften to town, and hope that printing the letters directed to him, which I know not how to anfwer, will bring him speedily, and therefore I add alfo the following:

"MR. BICKERStaff,

"July 5, 1709.

"You have hinted a generous intention of taking under your confideration, the whisperers without business and laughers

without occafion; as you tender the welfare of your country, I entreat you not to forget or delay fo publick-spirited a work. Now or never is the time. Many other calamities may cease with the war, but I difmally dread the multiplication of these mortals under the ease and luxuriousness of a fettled peace, half the bleffings of which may be destroyed by them. Their mistake lies certainly here, in a wretched belief, that their mimickry paffes for real business or true wit. Dear fir, convince them that it never was, is, or ever will be, either of them; nor ever did, does, or to all futurity ever can, look like either of them; but that it is the most curfed difturbance in nature which is poffible to be inflicted on mankind, under the noble definition of a fociable creature. In doing this, fir, you will oblige more humble servants than can find room to subfcribe their names."

In pursuance to my last date from hence (White's chocolatehouse), I am to proceed on the accounts I promised of feveral perfonages among the men whofe confpicuous fortunes, or ambition in fhowing their follies, have exalted them above their fellows. The levity of their minds is vifible in their every word and gesture, and there is not a day paffes but puts me in mind of Mr. Wycherley's character of a coxcomb, "He is ugly all over, with the affectation of the fine gentleman." Now, though the women may put on softness in their looks, or affected feverity, or impertinent gaiety, or pert smartness, their felf-love cannot, under any of these disguises, appear fo invincible as that of the men. You may easily take notice, that, in all their actions, there is a fecret approbation, either in the tone of their voice, the turn of their body, or cast of their eye, which shows that they are extremely in their own favour.

Take one of your men of business: he shall keep you halfan-hour with your hat off, entertaining you with his confideration of that affair you spoke of to him laft, until he has drawn a crowd that obferves you in this grimace; then, when he is publick enough, he immediately runs into fecrets and falls a whispering. You and he make breaks with adverbs, as, " But

however, thus far ;" and then you whisper again, and fo on, till they who are about you are difperfed, and your busy man's vanity is no longer gratified by the notice taken of what importance he is, and how inconfiderable you are, for your pretender to bufinefs is never in fecret, but in public.

There is my dear Lord Nowhere, of all men the most gracious and moft obliging, the terror of all valets de chambre, whom he oppreffes with good breeding, in inquiring for my good lord and for my good lady's health. This inimitable courtier will whisper a privy counsellor's lacquey with the utmost goodness and condefcenfion, to know when they next fit; and is thoroughly taken up, and thinks he has a part in a fecret, if he knows that there is a fecret, what it is, he will whisper you, "that time will discover;" then he fhrugs, and calls back again-you "6 Sir, I need not say to you that these things are not to be spoken of and hark'ee, no names, I would not be quoted." What adds to the jeft is, that his emptiness has its moods and feafons, and he will not condefcend to let you into thefe, his discoveries, except he is in very good humour or has feen fomebody of fashion talk to you. He will keep his nothing to himself, and pass by and overlook as well as the best of them, not observing that he is infolent when he is gracious, and obliging when he is haughty. Shew me a woman fo inconfiderable as this frequent character.

But my mind (now I am in) turns to many no less observable. Thou dear Will Shoeftring! I profefs myself in love with thee! How fhall I speak to thee? how fhall I address thee? how fhall I draw thee? thou dear outfide! Will you be combing your wig, playing with your box, or picking your teeth? or choosest thou rather to be speaking-to be speaking for thy only purpofe in fpeaking-to fhew your teeth? Rub them no longer, dear Shoeftring: do not premeditate murder: do not for ever whiten: oh! that for my quiet and his own they were rotten.

But I will forget him and give my hand to the courteous Umbra. He is a fine man indeed, but the foft creature bows below my apron-string before he takes it; yet after the first ceremonies, he is as familiar as my phyfician, and his infignifi

cancy makes me half ready to complain to him of all I would to my doctor. He is fo courteous, that he carries half the messages of ladies' ails in town to their midwives and nurses. He understands, too, the art of medicine, as far as to the cure of a pimple or a rash. On occafions of the like importance, he is the most affiduous of all men living, in confulting and fearching precedents from family to family; then he speaks of his obfequiousness and diligence in the style of real services. If you fneer at him, and thank him for his great friendship, he bows and fays "Madam, all the good offices in my power, while I have any knowledge or credit, fhall be at your service." The confideration of so shallow a being, and the intent application with which he pursues trifles, has made me carefully reflect upon that fort of men we ufually call an impertinent; and I am, upon mature deliberation, fo far from being offended with him, that I am really obliged to him; for though he will take you afide and talk half an hour upon matters wholly infignificant with the most folemn air, yet I confider that these things are of weight in his imagination, and he thinks he is communicating what is for my service. If, therefore, it be a just rule to judge of a man by his intention, according to the equity of good breeding, he that is impertinently kind or wise, to do you fervice, ought in return to have a proportionable place, both in your affection and esteem, so that the courteous Umbra deferves the favour of all his acquaintance; for though he never served them, he is ever willing to do it, and believes he does it.

As impotent kindness is to be returned with all our abilities to oblige, fo impotent malice is to be treated with all our force to depress it. For this reason, Fly-Blow (who is received in all the families in town through the degeneracy and iniquity of their manners) is to be treated like a knave, though he is one of the weakest of fools: he has by rote and at fecondhand all that can be faid of any man of figure, wit, and virtue in town. Name a man of worth, and this creature tells you the worst paffage of his life. Speak of a beautiful woman, and this puppy will whisper the next man to him, though he has nothing to fay of her. He is a fly that feeds on the fore

part, and would have nothing to live on if the whole body were in health. You may know him by the frequency of pronouncing the particle but; for which reafon I never heard him fpoke of with common charity without ufing my but against him. For a friend of mine faying the other day, "Mrs. Diftaff has wit, good humour, virtue, and friendship," this oaf added, "but fhe is not handfome." 'Coxcomb! the gentleman was faying what I was, not what I was not.'

N.B.-It is to be noted that when any part of this paper appears dull, there is a defign in it.