"Feb. 22, 1832. "Is there a heaven, dear Catharine? And is it true that, if once admitted there, we shall not only participate in joys of which we cannot now fully conceive; but that we shall be for ever free from every approach of sin—that we shall be holy? Can this be true, and we still cling to life-with the continuance of its struggles and its conflicts? "We live in a period when all christians, even those of the weakest capacity, and the most limited influence, may do something, yes very much, for the cause of God, and the salvation of perishing souls. We have become so accustomed to the great truths, which are continually reiterated in our hearing, that we do not suitably reflect upon them. "Have you read the recent letters from Robertson, Hill, and King, in Greece, and from Brewer in Turkey? When perusing such accounts, unless I am greatly deceived, I feel that it would be the noblest privilege that can be enjoyed on earth to engage, like those devoted servants of God, in teaching the ignorant and benighted. In comparison with their situation, cheerless as it is in many respects, and selfdenying as they must live, what has earth to offer? I know of no employment so desirable as that of a faithful missionary of the humble Jesus. 66 'Lately, I have heard much said against the ostentatious expressions of some who were candidates for this noble work, but ignorant, in a great degree, of its nature, and of the duties and dispositions it requires. It does not become those who are preparing for the field, to speak as if they had already won its laurels. The loudest in profession are often the feeblest in action. You will understand my meaning. I love to see the manifestation of a missionary spirit, but I think this may be done practically in our families. Surely to think much of those far distant, not too far, however, (if the case be possible,) to be assisted by our charities, or strengthened by our prayers, has a tendency to overcome our selfish feelings, and to enlist those sympathies, the exercise of which is beneficial to ourselves as well as others. "Believe me, now, as ever, your affectionate CHAPTER X. Marriage Solicitude for Divine Guidance-Cholera-Death of Mrs. Tillotson-Adopted Daughter-Family of the Christian -Vicissitudes of Life-Commencement of the Author's acquaintance with Mrs. Taylor. THE reference, in the preceding letter, to what may be done in families for the promotion of the missionary enterprise, will remind the reader that the thoughts of Miss Foote were directed to the duties of those who preside over the domestic circle, and produce a willingness to accompany her in the new relation upon which she was preparing to enter. On the 7th of April, she was married to Mr. John S. Taylor, of this city, and on the first of May commenced house-keeping. From the conscientious manner in which she had hitherto performed all her duties, we naturally expect that her future course will reflect credit on any station She had been in the school of afflicHer principles she may fill. tion, and evidently taught of God. of action were fixed on a basis too firm to be shaken. She had no desire but to live for the Divine glory. Alluding to the contemplated change in her condition, several months before it took place, she said, "I fear not temporal evils,-my prayer to God is, give us thy blessing, which maketh rich and addeth If we are numbered among those who walk not after the flesh but after the Spirit, all will be well." no sorrow. She could not assume her new responsibilities without devout supplication, that she might at all times rely upon an everlasting arm. Fully conscious of her entire dependence, she earnestly endeavoured to live, each day, in view of the awful circumstances attending her final account. Her recent sickness, and present occasional suffering, taught her that she could not anticipate a long residence on earth; that she must be dilligent while the day lasted, for soon the sun of her pilgrimage would go down. Writing to her sister, she refers to the time of her union, and glances forward to the period when that and all other earthly relations would cease. "I hope I may never forget the solemnities of that hour. It is not a light thing to take such vows and obligations upon oneself. "My health is in every respect improving, though I am very far from being well, and am confident that a slight thing would lay me again upon a bed of sick ness. "I am in the hands of a kind and ever-watchful Parent, and desire to be resigned to whatever he shall choose for me. Do you not think it strange that we ever shrink from death, the necessary prelude to eternal blessedness? If that blessedness consists in being admitted into the presence of God and the Lamb, should we not rejoice in view of it, and welcome the hour which gives us a passport thither ?" In July, she had the satisfaction of again visiting her parental home; a privilege which, for a long time, she never expected to enjoy. Her song was still of mercy. She recounted to her relatives the conflicts through which the Lord had carried her ; dwelling with especial interest on the consolations of his grace. Her close view of the eternal world had changed the aspect of surrounding objects. She felt that she was indeed a pilgrim upon earth, and that, whether her days here were few or many they should all be given to the Lord. In this beloved domestic circle, time passed pleasantly away; she was cheered, refreshed, and strengthened; and would have prolonged her stay but for a providential dispensation, which awakened painful solicitude through the length and breadth of our land. The cholera was already making its ravages in New York. A large number had fallen victims, and no human foresight could predict when its work would be completed. The desire to spend the summer with her connections would be increased, on account of the danger attending a return to the city. But there were other feelings more powerful, which influenced her determination. Circumstances rendered it necessary for her husband to remain in New York. Knowing the danger to which he would be exposed, she thought not of her own health or comfort; but made arrangements for an immediate return. "As the boat drew near the city," she says, "instead of the usual bustle and din of business, a scene of desolation was presented, the wharves and streets seemed to be deserted. It made my heart sicken, untill I reached home, and found all as when I left them. I then felt calin again, and have suffered far less from anxiety than I did in Middle Haddam. "You will perceive, from the papers, that the disease is advancing rapidly in every quarter. On Friday there were 311 new cases reported, and 104 deaths. Never was there such a time known here. May the great Ruler and Disposer of events, in mercy grant that this season of severe visitation be shortened, the sword of the destroying angel stayed, and health restored to our afflicted country." Many will long remember the suffering produced by this afflictive visitation. He must be a stranger to the sorrows of the destitute and the orphan, who has not often heard the affecting statement; "My mother died of the cholera." Mrs. Taylor was mercifully preserved. But before the disease had ceased its ravages, it became her painful duty to watch by the dying bed of a long-tried friend and relative. Her strong attachment to Mr. and Mrs. Tillotson has already been mentioned.* Her grief at the death of Mr. T. was like that of a child at the loss of a beloved parent. Mrs. T. assumed the obligations of the christian covenant on the same day with herself. They were much together, and each • See page 21. |