Imágenes de páginas

miracle upon miracle, would not make me fand without new supply from God. The thing I rejoice in is, that is altogether full, and that in the mediator Christ Jesus there's all the fulness of the Godhead, and it will never run out.

After a while's filence, come having heard him groaning, he said, 'tis not for pain I'm groaning, but for the poor church of Scotland, and for the cup of indignation in the Lord's hand that's going about, I have been days, weeks and months iu terror, think. ing what would I do in the days of peftilence; but now I see in him there's safety, and that an inviGble God can keep from a visible stroke ; but o'tis a strange thing to consider how an unbelieving heart could not trust him ; but now I'm keep' in perfect peace. The name of the Lord's a Itrong tower ;' here's a strong tower : And he that dwells under the shadow of the most high shall abide, and not be afraid. Q the book of God, firs, is a rich treasure, a sweet book ; make all much use of your bibles.. * Then to his wife, he said, o wait upon him, for he's a good God to his own, and he never takes any thing from them, but he gives them as good, and better back again ; ye'll get himself. My dear, we have had many a sweet day together; we must part for a while, but we'll meet again, and shall bave one work in the praises of God, in the praises of the lamb. O how wonderful is it ! and let my soul wonder, O to get a discovery of him, eye to eye; ?tis so much inliv'ning: 'Tis life eternal to know the living God and Jesus Christ. I will not say with Job when 'tis more ning, when will it be evening ? no, I dare not say ita It will be but a little while, I'll get reft.

Then to some present, he said, do ye think that. he'll come and receive the prisoner of hope the day? Whether he do or no, holy and righteous is he, but I confess, I long for it. This is vaftly more that 'I am bearing than many deaths, and yet the Lord

: bears

bears up sweetly with his power.' Were it not the power of grace, nature would distract, under what I have upon me even now, but the Lord upholds me. I do not weary ; but the hireling longs for his wages. He seems in his adorable wisdom to try me further, and holy and reverend is his name ; he is not want. ing to me, One said, well that's enough, if he's now giving you a heavy burden to bear, he gives you fuch remarkable supply. He said, I desire only grace to be faithful to the death unto the Lord Jesus, unto · my God, until I come to the land of praises, eyen to Jerusalem's gates to pay thanks to the name of the God of Jacob. One said, you have his promise for through-bearing and he cannot fall in performing it. I hear the defluxion has been uneafie to you that night. He answered, yea, yea; but o keep me from impatience, or charging my God foolishly. One said, 'tis weak faith that cannot believe, when it has fuch a support of sensible comfort, as you have. He answered, the hundreth part of this trouble would have put me into a distraction, if the Lord had not fustained me. This is his day, 'tis his holy reft. I long for the rest; I long for this disireable reft, One said, well, you have reached a will submissive to his. He answered, it takes a great deal of hammering to polish us, and make us meet for the inheritance of the Taints in light,

To his lon, he said, my dear David, I'm lying here man, finding how good God is ; and I would fain have my David, I would fain have you God's, and acquaint with his way, that when I'm dead, I may live in you, and you may tell to the generation not born, how good God is. O man, if I had you a feek. er of God, i would think myself happy in it. Then a minister ask'd, if he should pray. He answered, yea, yea, pray for me. "After prayer, he faid, this night my skin has burnt, my heari las panted, my body has been bruis'd on


the bed with weakness, and there is a foće upon me that's racking my spirit, and my heart has been sometimes like to fail; and yet I cannot say, but the Lord after all this trouble holds me in health in the midst of all. If the Lord should give such support, and continue me years in this case, I haye no reason to complain. One said, no hypocrite is able to coun. terfeit chat language in such a case as you are in. He answered, 'tis a great wonder to me, as to any about me. Brother. I know not whether I may not Jefire you to beg of the Lord, with respect to this poor body, even to pity and to short'n, if it be his will, my trial ; the hireling longs for his wages; but I have reafon to do it with submission.

Thereafter, he faid, my body has got such a hurt, that I believe I will fearce recover it ; and that's the thing that keeps all my body in a fire. The panting for want of breath is over ; but O'tis the mercy of God that keeps me compos'd, This trouble of my bowels draws my stomach, and altogether as if it were: with cords : And yet I must say, 'what am I, and what's my father's house, that God has brought me hitherto !' one said, you've resign'd yoursell to his will and pleasure; and he'll strengthen you with pa. tience; he gives strength for the burden. He an. swered, he has done it hitherto, I have a heart warm to God, and I have a carnal heart too. One faid.. corruption will remain while in the body. He answer. ed, but I long to be away, to get a deliverance. One faid in due time that'll come. Then he said I'm lying here, and the Lord helps me to wait for that consolation that's in Christ, that will fill me with admiration to eternity : But I have already the pleasant peaceable fruits of righteousness, and sweet composure. I had what was worse than a thousand deaths, and he has held me by the hand.

To the minister he said, the Lord has been fill with me. I'm carnal but I long for a deliverance:


from the remainders of a body of fin. I long for a deliverance from this trouble ; if God lengthen it out, if he give moe troubles, then why not, righteous is his name. I know not what alteration may be, I long indeed for a share of that everlasting rest; and I confess I'm like a bird on the wing, and I would fain be at Immanuel's land, where the tree of life is, Well, all this is encouragement to you to acquaint yourself with God ; you see religion is advantageous great's the gain of godlinels. All these soft clothes are like facking about me ; and yet I have perfect ease of spirit. My breast is drawing together, as fore as it were with cords ; and still the Lord keeps com posure. What's this ! I could have scarce believ'd, tho'I had been told it, that I could have been kept in the right exercise of my judgment under this racking pain. The drawing of the breast seems to me to be, as if I were all hung together, all pulld together : So that I would make that improvement, whatever come of it, I'm sure I'm a demonstration that there is a reality in religion; and I rejoice in this, that God has honoured a finful worm, so as to be a demonstration of his grace. . I'm preaching the gospel, I have a dis. pensation committed to me, shame belongs to me; I'm a sinner, the praise of all belongs to him ; worthy is the lamb, to receive glory. I hope I fall shortly be at that glory I've been long expecting : tho'.I come not near Mr, Shield's glory nor Mr. An. derson's, &c. only, O if I were in, I'll be well enough I'll be well enough when I win in. Dear friends a. hout me, take the commendation of my hand; while I live I must preach the gospel : He has given me a while yet here, that should still to commend him. The word speaks, providence speaks in me; and if there be a despising of the gospel under this new dir. covery, take heed, it will still make it the worse with you. Glory to him that ever he revealed himself in me; he's free in his love. I was wallowing in my

blood; blood, but he past by and cast his skirt over me ; like the kindly mother to the bairn, at first it behoved to be cleansed and swaddled, and again cleansed after : that 'tis puddlcd so I'll be to cleanse to to the end,

To two ministers that tarried with him, when the reft went to the church, he said, I would desire a word read, and prayer, and if my head would endure, I would fain hear singing. I do not now find any change but there, may be ; and I'm the less concerned, because the Lord in some measure has taken away that inclination to limit him as to the hour; though ye may be sure the hireling longs for his wages. He caused read Psalm. Ixxxiv. and sing the latter part of it, and pray: And after prayer, he hav. ing joined in singing, said, I had always a mistuned voice, a bad car, but which is worst of all, a mistuned heart; but shortly when I join the temple service a. bove, there shall not be, world without end, one ftring of the affections out of lune, And after that, he caused one of the ministers sead to him, what doctor Owen had faid of this temple service above, in his book on the person of Christ, often this day did be blessGod he had been helped to give such a testimony to God's ways. • To fome that came from church, he said, you have been in the assembly of God's people, the desir. able assembly wherein communion and fellowship with the father and son may be attained ; and all these enjoyments are among the most valuable to be had here, and they are the way to our rest, which re. mains for the people of God : But 0 ! to be joined with the company above. How amiable are thy tabernacles, even here ! but more fo above, where there's the eagle's eye, that can see a glorious lighi. even the light of the Lord. Now, our faith, even as its highest elevation here, when it looks to these things, they are so great, that we pass from our compearance, we're not able to behold them. Now, I


« AnteriorContinuar »