I looked on. Bene. Doyon question me, as an honest man should to trust none; and the fine is, (for the which I may go Bene. With anger, with sickness, or with hunger, my Claud. Thou thivkest, I am in sport; I pray thee, tell Bene. If I do, hang me in a bottle like a cat, and shoot at me; and he that hits me, let him be clapped on the D. Pedro. Well, as time shall try: such great letters as they write, Here is good horse to see Benedick the married man. Claud. I would scarce trust myself, though I had sworn D. Pedro. Well, you will temporize with the hours. In the mean time, good signior Benedick, repair to Claud. To the tuition of God; from my house, (if I had it)- D. Pedro. The sixth of July: your loving friend, Be- you nedick. Bene. Nay, mock not, mock not! The body of your guards are but slightly basted on neither: ere you flout [Exit Benedick. Any hard lesson that may do thee good. Claud. Hath Leonato any son, my lord ? 0, my lord, When you went onward on this ended action, Thatlik’d, but had a rougher task in hand All prompting me, how fair young Hero is, Saying, I lik'd her, ere I went to wars. D. Pedro. Thou wilt be like a lover presently, That thou began'st to twist so fine a story? That know love's grief by his complexion ! Bene. That a woman conceived me, I thank her; that But lest my liking might too sudden seem, she brought me up, I likewise give her most humble I would have salv'd it with a longer treatise. thanks: but that I will have a recheat winded in my D. Pedro. What need the bridge much broader than forehead, or hang my bugle in an invisible baldrick, all the flood? women shall pardon me. Because I will not do them. The fairest grant is the necessity : the wrong to mistrust any, I will do myself the right Look, what will serve, is fit: 'tis once, thou lov'st; And I will fit thee with the remedy. {time, let me be that I am, and seek not to alter me. Con. Can you make no use of your discontent? D. John. I make all use of it, for I use it only.--Who comes here? What news, Borachio? Enter BORACHIO. Bora. I came yonder from a great supper; the prince, your brother, is royally entertained by Leonato; and I can give you intelligence of an intended marriage. D. John. Willit serve for any model to build mischief (Exeunt. on? What is he for a fool, that betroths himself to unquietness? D, John. Who? the most exquisite Claudio ? D.John. A proper squire! And who, and who ? which Leonato. D. John. Come, come, let us thither; this may prove I bless myself every way: you are both sare, and will ACT II. SCENE 1.- A hall in Leonato's house. Enter Leonato, Antonio, Hero,BEATRICE, and others. Ant. I saw him not. Hero. He is of a very melancholy disposition. in the mid-way between him and Benedick: the one is Leon. By my troth, niece, thou wilt never get thee a horns. Leon. You may light upon a husband that hath no answer. hath no beard, is less than a man : and he, that is more Balth, No more words; the clerk is answered. Urs. I know you by the waggling of your head. your excellent wit? Can virtue hideitself? Go to,mum, Beat. Will you not tell me, who told you so ?: signior Benedick that said so. Beat. Why, he is the prince's jester: a very dull fool; is not in his wit, but in his villainy; for he both plea- Bene. In every good thing. Borachio, and Claudio. hath withdrawn her father to break with him about it: D. John. Are not you signior Benedick? him from her, she is no equal for his birth: you may do D. Pedro. With me in your company ? the part of an honest man in it. Claud. How know you he loves her? D. John. I heard him swear his affection. to-night. {Exeunt Don Johın and Borachio. But hear these ill news with the cars of Claudio, (Takes her aside. "Tis certain s0;—the prince wooes for himself, Bene. Well, I would you did like me. Friendship is constant in all other things, Marg. So would not I, for your own sake; for I have Save in the office and affairs of lover many ill qualities. Therefore, all hearts in love use their own tongues; Let every eye negotiate for itself, And trust no agent: for beauty is a witch, This is an accident of hourly proof, Which I mistrusted not: farewell, therefore, Hero! Re-enter BesediCK. Claud, Yea, the same. ers, I walk away. see him? Bene. Come, will you go with me? Re-enter CLAUDIO and BEATRICE, Claud. Whither? D. Pedro, Look, here she comes, Bene. Even to the next willow, about your own busi- Bene. Will your grace command me any service to ness, count. What fashion will you wear the garland the world's end? I will go on the slightest errand now to of ? About your neck, like an usurer's chain ? or under the Antipodes, that you can devise to send me on; I will your arm, like a lieutenant's scarf? You must wear it fetch you a tooth-picker now from the farthest inch one way, for the prince hath got your Hero. of Asia; bring you the length of Prester John's foot; Claud. I wish him joy of her. fetch you a hair off the great Cham's beard ; do you any Bene. Why, that's spoken like an honest drover; so embassage to the Pigmies, rather than hold three they sell bullocks. But did you think the prince would words' conference with this harpy. You have no emhave served you thus? ployment for me? Claud. I pray you, leave me! D. Pedro. None, but to desire your good company. Bene, Ho! now you strike like the blind man; 'twas Bene. O God, sir, here's a dish I love not; I cannot the boy that stole your meat, and you'll beat the post. endure my lady Tongue. (Exit. Claud, Ifit will not be, I'll leave you. (Exit, D. Pedro. Come, lady, come; you have lost the Bene, Alas, poor hurt fowl! Now will he creep into heart of signior Benedick. sedges.----But,that my lady Beatrice should know me, Beat. Indeed, my lord, he lentit me a while; and I and not know me! The prince's fool!--Ha! it may be, gave him use for it, a double heart for his singleone: I go under that title, because I am merry.-Yea; but marry, once before, he won it of me with false dice, 80; I am apt to do myselfwrong: I am not so reputed: therefore your grace may well say, I have lost it. it is the base, the bitter disposition of Beatrice, that D. Pedro. You have put him down, lady, you have puts the world into her person, and so gives me out. put him down! Well, I'll be revenged as I may! Beat. So I would not he should do me, my lord, lest I should prove the mother of fools. I have brought Re-enter Don PEDRO, Hero, and LEONATO. count Claudio, whom you sent me to seek. D. Pedro. Now, signior, where's the count? Did you D. Pedro. Why, how now, count? wherefore are you Claud. Notsad, my lord. sad? God give thee joy! my fortunes: his grace hath made the match, and all yon are mine, I am yours: I give away myself for you, D. Pedro. I will but teach them to sing, and restore and dote upon the exchange. them to the owner. Beat. Speak, cousin; or, if you cannot, stop his mouth Bene.If their singing answer your saying, by my faith, with a kiss, and let him not speak, neither! you say honestly. D. Pedro. In faith, lady, you have a merry heart. D. Pedro. The lady Beatrice hath a quarrel to you , Beat. Yea, my lord; I thank it, poor fool, it keeps the gentleman, that danced with her, told her, she is on the windy side of care. My cousin tells him in his much wronged by you. ear, that he is in her heart. Bene. O, she misused me past the endurance of a Claud. And so she doth, cousin. block; an oak, but with one green leaf on it, would Beat. Good lord, for alliance !—Thus goes every one have answered her; my very visor began to assume life, to the world but I, and I am sun-burned; I may sit in a and scold with her. She told me, not thinking I had corner, and cry, heigh ho! for a husband. been myself, that I was the prince's jester; that I was D. Pedro. Lady Beatrice, I will get you one. duller than a great thaw; huddling jest upon jest, with Beat.I would rather have one of your father's getting. such impossible conveyance, upon me, that I stood like Hath your grace ne'er a brother like yon? Your father a man at a mark, with a whole army shooting at me. She got excellent husbands, if a maid could come by them. speaks poniards, and every word stabs: if her breath D. Pedro. Will you have me, lady? were as terrible as her terminations, there were no Beat. No, my lord, unless I might have another for living near her, she would infect to the north star. I working-days; your grace is too costly to wear every would not marry her, though she were endowed with day. – But, I beseech your grace, pardon me; I was all that Adam had left him before he transgressed: she born to speak all mirth, and no matter. would have made liercules have turned spit; yea, and D. Pedro. Your silence most offends me, and to be have cleftlis club to make the fire too. Come, talk not merry best becomes you; for, out of question, you of her; you shall find her the infernal Até in good ap- were born in a merry hour. parel. I would to God, some scholar would conjure Beat. No, sure, my lord, my mother cry'd; but then her; for, certainly, while she is here, a man may live there was a star danced, and under that was I born.as quiet in hell, as in a sanctuary; and people sin upou Cousins, God give you joy! purpose, because they would go thither; so, indeed, Leon. Niece, will you look to those things I told alldisquiet, horror, and perturbation follow her. nest. you of? to will uch 20t; Free onot the and I one: dice, son, hare de les cought cun Beat. I cry you mercy, uncle.-By your grace's par- Bora, Proof enough to misuse the prince, to vex don. [Exit Beatrice. Claudio, to undo Hero, and kill Leonato. Look you D. Pedro. By my troth, a pleasant-spirited lady! for any other issue? Leon. There's little of the melancholy element in her, D. John. Only to despite them, I will endeavour any know, that Hero loves me; intend a kind of zeal both D.Pedro.She cannot endure to hear tell of a husband. to the prince and Claudio, as-in love of your brother's Leon. O, by no means; she mocks all her wooers out honour, who hath made this match, and his friend's of snit. reputation, who is thus like to be cozened with the D. Pedro. She were an excellent wife for Benedick. semblance of a maid, -that you have discovered thus. Leon. O Lord! my lord, if they were but a week mar- They will scarcely believe this without trial : olier ried, they would talk themselves mad. them instances; which shall bear no less likelihood, D. Pedro. Count Claudio, when mean you to go to than to see me at her chamber-window, hear me call church? Margaret Hero; hear Margaret term me Borachio ; Claud. To-morrow, my lord. Time goes on crutches, and bring them to see this, the very night before the till love have all his rites. intended wedding: for, in the mean time, I will so Leon. Not till Monday, my dear which is hence fashion the matter, that llero shall be absent; and there ajust seven-night; and a time too brief too, to have shall appear such seeming truth of Hero's disloyalty, all things answer my mind. that jealousy shall be call'd assurance, and all the preD. Pedro. Come, you shake the head at so long a paration overthrown. breathing; but, I warrant thee, Claudio, the time shall D. John. Grow this to what adverse issue it can, I not go dully by us ; I will, in the interim, undertake one will put it in practice, Be cunning in the working this, of Hercules' labours; which is, to bring signior Bene- and thy fee is a thousand ducats. dick and the lady Beatrice into a mountain of affection, Bora. Be you constant in the accusation, and my the one with the other. I would fain have it a match; ning shall not shame me. and I doubt not but to fashion it, if you three will but D. John. I will presently go learn their day of marminister such assistance, as I shall give you direction. riage. (Exeunt. SCENE III.—Leonato's garden. Enter BENEDICK and a boy. Bene. Boy,- Bene. In my chamber-window lies a book; bring it D. Pedro. And Benedick is not the unhopefullest hither to me in the orchard. husband that I know: thus far can I praise him; he is Boy. I am here already, sir. of a noble strain, of approved valour, and confirmed Bene. I know that;- but I would have thee hence, honesty. I will teach you, how to humour your cousin, and here again. (Exit Boy.]—I do much wonder, that that she shall fall in love with Benedick:--and I, with one man, seeing how much another man is a fool, when your two helps, will so practise on Benedick, that, in he dedicates his behaviours to love, will, after he hath despite of his quick wit and his queasy stomach, he laughed at such shallow follies in others, become the shall fall in love with Beatrice. Ifwe can do this, Cu- argument of his own scorn, by falling in love: and such pid is no longeran archer; his glory shall be ours, for a man is Claudio. I have known, when there was no we are the only love-gods. Go in with me, and I will music with him but the drum and fife ; and now had tell you my drift. (Exeunt. he rather hear the tabor and the pipe. I have known, when he would have walked ten mile a-foot, to see a SCENEII. - Another room in Leonato's house. good armour; and now will he lie ten nights awake, Enter Don John and BORACHIO. carving the fashion of a new doublet. He was wont to D. John. It is so; the count Claudio shall marry the speak plain, and to the purpose, like an honest man, daughter of Leonato. and a soldier; and now is he turn'd orthographer; his Bora. Yea, my lord; but I can cross it. words are a very fantastical banquet, just so many D. John. Any bar, any cross, any impediment will be strange dishes. May I be so converted, and see with medicinable to me: I am sick in displeasure to him; and these eyes ? I cannot tell; I think not: I will not be whatsoever comes athwart his affection, ranges evenly sworn, but love may transform me to an oyster; but with mine. How canst thon cross this marriage? I'll take my oath on it, till he have made an oyster of Bora. Not honestly, my lord; but so covertly, that me, he shall never make me such a fool. One woman no dishonesty shall appear in me. is fair; yet I am well: another is wise ; yet I am well : D.John. Show me briefly, how! another virtuous; yet I am well: but till all graces be Bora. I think, I told your lordship, a year since, how in one woman, one woman shall not come in my grace. much I am in the favour of Margaret, the waiting-Rich she shall be, that's certain ; wise, or I'll none; gentlewoman to Hero. virtuous, or I'll never cheapen her; fair, or I'll never D. John. I remember. look on her; mild, or come not near me; noble, or not Bora. I can, at any unseasonable instant of the night, I for an angel; of good discourse, an excellent musiappoint her to look ont at her lady's chamber-window. cian, and her hair shall be of what colour it please D.John. What life is in that to be the death of this God.-Ha! the prince and monsieur Love! I will hide marriage ? me in the arbour. (Withdraws. Bora. The poison of that lies in you to temper. Go Enter Don Pedro, Leonato, and Claudio. you to the prince, your brother; spare not to tell him, D. Pedro, Come, shall we hear this music? that he hath wronged his honour in marrying the re Claud. Yea, my good lord.—How still the evening is, nowned Claudio (whose estimation do you mightily Ashush'd on purpose to grace harmony! hold up) to a contaminated stale, such a one, as Hero. D. Pedro. Seeyou where Benedick hath hid himself? D.John. What proof shall I make of that? Claud. 0, very well, my lord: the music ended, |