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Sir And. Good mistress Accost, I desire better ac- thou not go to church in a galliard, and come home in a quaintance.
coranto? My very walk should be a jig! I would not so var. My name is Mary, sir.
much as make water, hut in a sink-a-pace. What dost Sir. And. Good mistress Mary Accost,
thou mean? is it a world to hide virtuies in? I did think, Sir To. You mistake, knight: accost is, front her, by the excellent constitution of thy leg, it was formed board her, woo her, assail her.
under the star of'a galliaril. Sir And. By my troth, I would not undertake her in Sir And. Av, 'tis strong, and it does indifferent well this company. Is that the meaning of accost? in a flame-coloured stock. Shall we set about some Mar. Fare you well, gentlemen.
revels? Sir To. Anthou let part so, sir Andrew, 'would thou Sir To. What shall we do else? were we not boru might'st never draw sword again.
under Taurus? Sir ind. An you part so, mistress, I would I might Sir And. Taurus ? that's sides and heart. never draw sword again, l'air ludy, do you think you Sir To. No, sir; it is legs and thighs. Let me see thee have fools in haad?
caper: ha! higlier: ha, ha! — excellent! (Pxeunt.
Enter VALENTINE, and V:OLA in nuan's attire.
taphor? stranger. Sir And. Why, I think so; I am not such an ass, but 11o. You either fear his humour, or my negligence, Ican keep my hané dry. But what's your jest? that
you call in question the continuance of his love. Mar. A dry jest, sir.
Is he inconstant, sir, in his favours?
Val. No, believe me.
Enter Duke, CURIO, and Attendants.
Vio. On your attendance, my lord; here. Sir And. Never in your life, I think; unless you see Duhe. Stand you a while aloof. — Cesario, canary put me down. Methinks, soinetimes I have no Thou know’st no less but all; I have unclaspid more wit than a Christian, or an ordinary man has : butTo thee the book even of my secret soul: I am a great eater of beel, and, I believe, that does Therefore, good youth, address thy gait unto her; harn to my wit.
Be not deny'd access, stand at her doors,
And tell them, there thy fixed foot shall
Vio. Sure, my noble lord,
If she be so abandon'd to her sorrow,
Vio. Say, I do speak with her, my lordl; what then? Sir To. Then hadst thou had an excellent head of Duke. O, then told the passion of my love, hair.
Surprise her with discourse of my dear faith :
Thanin anuncio of more grave aspect.
That say, thou art a man : Diana's lip
I know, thy constellation is right apt Sir To. She'll none o' the count; she'll not match For this atlair. – Some four, or five, attend him; above her degree, neither in estate, years, nor wit; 1 All, if you will; for I myself am best, have heard her swear it. Tut, there's life in't, man. When least in company. - Prosper well in this, Sir And. I'll stay a month longer. I am a fellow o' And thou shalt live as freely as thy lord, the strangest mind i' the world; I delight in masques To call his fortunesthine. and revels sometimes altogether.
V 10. I'll do my best, Sir To. Artthon good at these kickshaws, knight? To woo your lady: yet, (.Aside.] a barful strife! Sir And. As any man in Illyria, whatsoever he be, Whoe'er I woo, myself would be his wise. [Exeunt. under the degree of my betters; and yet I will not compare with an old man.
SCENE V. A room in (livia's house. Sir To. What is thy excellence in a galliard, knight?
Enter Mania, and Clown. Sir And. 'Faith, I can cut a caper.
Mar. Nay, either tell me, where thou hast been, or I Sir To. And I can cut the matton to't.
will not open my lips, so wide as a bristle may enter, in Sir And. And, I think, I have the back-trick, sim- way of thy excuse: my lady will hang thee for thy abply as strong as any man in Illyria. Sir To, Wherefore are these things hid? wherefore clo. Let her hang me! he, that is well hanged in this have these gifts a curtain before them? are they like world, needs to fear no colours. to take dust, like mistress Mall's picture? whý dost! Mar. Make that good!
Clo. He shall see none to fear.
Oli. How say you to that, Malvolio? Mar. A good lenten answer! I can tell thee where Mal. I marvel your ladyship takes delight in such a that saying was born, of I fear no colours.
barren rascal; I saw him put down the other day with Clo, Where, good mistress Mary?
an ordinary fool, that has no more brain, than a stone. Mar. In the wars; and that may you be bold to say in Look you now, he's out of his guard already; unless your foolery.
you laugh and minister occasion to him, he is gagged. clo. Well, God give them wisdom, that have it; and I protest, I take these wise men, that crow so at these those that are fools, let them use their talents. set kind of fools, no better than the fools' zanies.
Mar. Yet you will be hanged, for being so long ab Oli. O, you are sick of self-love, Malvolio, and taste sent: or,
to be turned away, is not that as good as a with a distempered appetite. To be generous, guilthanging to you?
less, and of free disposition, is to take those things Clo. Many a good hanging prevents a bad marriage; for bird-bolts, that you deem cannon-bullets: there and for turning away, let summer bear it out.
is no slander in an allowed fool, though he do nothing Mar. You are resolute then?
but rail; nor no railing in a known discreet man, Clo. Not so neither; but I am resolved on two points. though he do nothing but reprove. Mar. That, if one break, the other will hold; or, if Clo. Now Mercury endue thee with leasing, for thou both break, your gaskins fall.
speakest well of fools! Clo. Apt, in good faith; very apt! Well, go thy
Re-enter Maria. way; if sir Toby would leave drinking, thou wert as Mar. Madam, there is at the gate a young gentleman, witty a piece of Eve's flesh as any in Illyria.
much desires to speak with you. Mar. Peace, you rogue, no more o’that; here comes Oli. From the count Orsino, is it? my lady: make your excuse wisely, you were best. Mar, I know not, madam; 'tis a fair young man, and
(Exit. wellattended. Enter Olivia and MALFOLIO.
Oli. Who of my people hold him in delay? Clo. Wit, an't be thy will, put me into good fooling! Mar, Sir Toby, madam, your kinsman. Those wits, that think they have thee,do very oft prove oli. Fetch him off, I pray you; he speaks nothing but fools; and I, that am sure Iack thee, may pass for a madman: fye on him! (Exit Maria.] Go you, Malwise man: for what says Quinapulus? Better a witty volio: ifit be a suit from the count, i am sick, or not fool, than a foolish wit. - God bless thee, lady! at home; what you will, to dismiss it. (Exit MalvoOli. Take the fool away!
lio.] Now you see, sir, how your fooling grows old, and Clo. Do you not hear, fellows? Take away the lady! people dislike it. Oli. Go to, you're a dry fool; I'll no more of you: Clo. Thou hast spoke for us, madonna, as if thy eldbesides, you grow dishonest.
est son should be a fool: whose skull Jove cram with Clo. Two faults, madonna, that drink and good coun- brains, for here he comes, one of thy kin, has a most sel will amend; for give the dry fool drink, then is the weak pia mater. fool not dry; bid the dishonest man mend himself; if
Enter SiR TOBY BELCI. he mend, he is no longer dishonest; if he cannot, let Oli. By mine honour, half drank.—What is he at the the botcher mend him. Any thing, that's mended, is gate, cousin ? but patched : virtue, that transgresses, is but patched Sir. To. A gentleman: with sin; and sin, that amends, is but patched with Oli. A gentleman? What gentleman? virtue. If'that this simple syllogism will serve, so; if Sir To. 'Tis a gentleman here
A plague o' these it will not, what remedy? As there is no true cuckold pickle-herrings! llow now, sot? but calamity, so beauty's a flower:— the lady bade clo. Good sir Toby, take away the fool; therefore, I say again, take her Oli. Consin, cousin, how have yon come so early by away!
this lethargy? oli. Sir, I bade them take away you.
Sir To. Lechery! I defy
chery! There's one at Clo. Misprision in the highest degree! - Lady, Cu- the gate. cullus non facit monachum; that's as much as to say, Oli. Ay, marry; what is he? I wear not motley in my brain. Good madonna, give Sir To. Let him be the devil, an he will, I care not: me leave to prove you a fool!
give me faith, sayl. Well, it's all one.
Erit. Oli. Can yon doit?
Oli. What's a drunken man like, fool? Clo. Dexterously, good madonna.
Clo. Like a drown'd man, a fool, and a madmau: one Oli. Make your proof!
draught above heat makes him a fool; the second mads Clo. I must catechize you forit, madonna; good my him; and a third drowns him. monse of virtue, answer me!
Oli. Go thou and seek the coroner, and let him sit o' Oli. Well, sir, for want of other idleness, I'll bide my coz; for he's in the third degree of drink, he's your proof.
drown'd: go, look after him. Clo. Good madonna, why mourn'st thou?
Clo, He is but mad yet, madonna; and the fool shall Oli. Good fool, for my brother's death.
look to the madman. Clo, I think, his soulis in hell, madonna.
Re-enter MALVOLJO. Oli. I know his sonlis in heaven, fool.
Mal. Madam,yond young fellow swears, he will speak Clo. The more fool you, madonna, to mourn for with you. I told him,you were sick; he takes on him to your brother's soul being in heaven. – Take away the understand so much, and therefore comes to speak with fool, gentlemen!
you : I told him you were asleep; he seems to have a Oli. What think you of this fool, Malvolio? doth he fore-knowledge of that too, and therefore comes to not mend?
speak with you. What is to be said to him, lady? he's Mal. Yes; and shall do, till the pangs of death shake fortified against any denial. him. Infirmity, that decays the wise, doth ever make Oli. Tell him, he shall not speak with me. the better fuol.
Mal. He has been told so; and he says, he'll stand Clo. God send you, sir, a speedy infirmity, for the at your door like a sheriff's post, and be the supporter better encreasing your folly! Sir Toby will be sworn, of a bench, but he'll speak with you. that I am no fox; but he will not pass his word for Oli. What kind of man is he? two-pence, that you are no fool.
Mal. Why, of man kind.
Foll, or no.
Oli. What manner of man?
| Vio. To answer by the method, in the first of his Mal. Of very ill manner; he'll speak with you, will heart.
Oli. 0, I have read it; it is heresy. Have you no more Oh. Of what personage, and years, is he?
to say? Mal. Not yet old enough for a man, nor young enough Vio. Good madam, let me see your face! for a boy; as a squash is before 'tis a peas-cod, or a Oli. Have you any commission from your lord to codling when 'tis almost an apple: 'tis with him e'en negociate with my face? you are now out of your text: standing water, between boy and man. He is very well, but we will draw the curtain, and shew you the picture. favoured, and he speaks very shrewishly; one would Look you, sir, such a one as I was this present: is't not think, his mother's milk were scarçc ont of him. well done?
(Unveiling Oli. Let him approach! Callin my gentlewoman! Vio. Excellently done, if God did all. Mal. Gentlewoman, my lady calls.
(Lxit. Oli. 'Tis in grain, sir; 'twill endure wind and Re-enter MARTA.
Nature's own sweet and cunning hand laid on.
Lady, you are the cruel’st she alive,
. Speak to me, I shall answer for her: Your will? And leave the world no copy.
Vio. I see you what you are: you are too proud;
But, if you were the devil, you are fair.
Oli. How does he love me?
V'io. With adorations, with fertile tears, Vio. No, my profound heart: and yet, by the very With groans that thunder love, with sighs of fire. fangs of malice, I swear, I am not that I play. Are you Oli. Your lord does know my mind, I cannot love him: the lady of the house?
Yet I suppose him virtuous, know him noble,
Of great estate, of fresh and stainless youth,
l'io. If I did love you in my master's flame,
In your denial I would find no sense,
Oli. Why, what would you?
And make!he babbling gossip of the air
Oli. You might do much. What is your parentage?
Vio. Above my fortunes, yet my state is well :
VO It alone concerns your ear. I bring no overture I cannot love him: let him send no more;
To tell me how he takes it. Fare you well:
Vio. I am no fee'd post, lady; keep your purse; Vio. The rudeness, that hath appear'd in me, have I My master, not myself, lacks recompense. learn'd from my entertainment. Whatsam, and what Love make his heart offlint, that you shall love; I would, are as secret, as maidenhead: to your ears, and let your fervour, like my master's, be divinity; to any others, profanation.
Plac'd in contempt! Farewell, fair cruelty! (Exit. Oli. Give us the place alone: we will hear this divi Oli. What is your parentage? nity. (Exit Maria.] - Now, sir, what is your text? Above my fortunes, yet my state is well; Vio. Most sweet lady,
I am a gentleman. - I'll be sworn thou art; Oli. Acomfortable doctrine, and much may be said Thy tongue, thy face, thy limbs, actions, and spirit, of it. Where lies your text?
Do give thee five-fold blazon:- Not too fast: – soft
Even so quickly may one catch the plague?
l'io. Even now, sir; on a moderate pace I have since Methinks, I feelthis youth's perfections,
arrived but hither. With an invisible anil subtle stealth,
Mal. She returns this ring to yon, sir ; you might To creepin at mine eyes. Well, let it be,
have saved me my pains, to have taken it away yourWhat, ho, Malvolio!
self. She adds moreover, that you should put your lord Re-enter Malvolio.
into a desperate assurance she will none of him: and Mal. Here, madam, at your service.
one thing more; that you be never so hardy to come
l'io. She took the ring of'me; I'll none of it. Desire him not to flatter with his lord,
Mal. Come, sir, you peevishly threw it to her; and Nor hold him up with hopes; I am not for him: her will is, it should be so returned: if it be worth If that the youth will come this way to-morrow, stooping for, there it lies in your eye; if not, be it his I'll give him reasons for't. Hie thee, Malvolio! that finds it.
(Exit. Mal, Madam, I will.
(Exit. l'io I left no ring with her: what means this lady? Oli, I do I know not what; and fear to find
Fortune forbid, my outside have not charm'd her!
She made good view of me; indeed, so much,
She loves me, sure; the cunning of her passion
Invites me in this churlish inessenger.
None of my lord's ring! why, he sent her none.
I am the man !—If it be so, (as 'tis,)
Poor lady, she were better love a dream.
Wherein the pregnant enemy does much.
Exit. of Messaline, whom, I know, you have heard of: he left belind him, myself, and a sister, both born in an SCENE III.- Aroom in Olivia's house. hour. If the heavens had been pleased, 'wonld we had Enter Sir Toby Belch, und Sir Andrew AGUE-CHEEK. so ended! but you, sir, altered that; for, some hour Sir To. Approach, sir Andrew: not to be a-bed after before you took me from the breach of the sea, was iny midnight, is to be up betimes; and diluculo surgere, sister drowned.
thon kuow'stAnt. Alas, the day!
Sir And. Nay, by my troth, I know not: but I know,
Sir And. 'Faith, so they say; but, I think, it rather
Ant. The gentleness of all the gods go with thee! and so sweet a breath to sing, as the fool has. In sooth,
thou wast in very gracious fooling last night, when Else would I very shortly see thee there:
thou spokest of Pigrogromitus, of the Vapians passing But, come what may, I do adore thee so,
the equinoctial of Quenbus; 'twas very good, i'faith. That dangershall seem sport, and I will go. (Exit. I sent thee sixpence for thy leman; hadst it?
Clo. I did impeticos thy gratillity; for Malvolio's
nose is no whipstock: my lady has a white hand, and
when all is done. Now, a song!
Sir To. Come on; there is sixpence for you: let's have please you to take leave of her, she is very willing to a song:
bid you farewell. Sir And. There's a testril of me too: if one knight Sir To. Farewell, dear heart, since I must needs be givea
gone. Clo. Would you have a love-song, or a song of good Mar. Nay, good sir Toby. life?
Clo. Hiseyes do shewhiš days are almost done.
Mal, Is't even so ?
Sir To, But I will never die.
llo. Sir Toby, there you lie.
Mul. This is much credit to you.
Sir To. Shall I bidhim go?
Singing 0, stay and hear; your true love's
Clo, Whatan il you do?
Sir To. Shall I did him go, and spare not?
Clo. O no, no, no, no, you dare not.
Sir To. Out o'time? sir, ye lie.-Art any more than
a steward? Dost thou think, because thou art virtuous, Sir And. Excellent good, i'faith!
there shall be no more cakes and ale? Sir To. Good, good!
Clo. Yes, by Saint Anne; and ginger shall be hot
i'the mouth too.
Sir To. Thou’rt i’theright.-Go, sir, rub your chain
with crums ! -A stoop of wine, Maria! In delay there lies no plenty ;
Mal. Mistress Mary, if you prized my lady's favour Then come kiss me, sweet-and-twenty,
at any thing more than contempt, you would not give
means for this uncivil rule; she shall know of it, by Youth's a stuf'will not endure.
[Exit. Sir Arid. Amellifluous voice, as I am true knight! Mar. Go shake your ears! Sir To. A contagious breath!
Sir And. "Twere as good a deed as to drink, when a Sir And. Very sweet and contagious, i'faith! man's a-hungry, to challenge him to the field; and Sir To. To hear by the nose, it is dulcet in contagion. then to break promise with him, and make a fool of him. But shall we make the welkin dance indeed ? Shall we Sir To. Do't, knight ; I'll write thee a challenge; or rouse the night-owl in a catch, that will draw three I'll deliver thy indignation to him by word of mouth. sonls out of one weaver? shall we do that?
Mar. Sweet sir Toby, be patient for to-night; since Sir And. An you love me,let's do't!I am dog at a catch the youth of the count's was to-day with my lady, she Clo. By'rlady, sir, and some dogs will catch well. is much out of qaiet. For monsieur Malvolio, let me Sir And. Most certain : let our catch be, Thou knave. alone with him: if I do not gull him into a nayword,
Clo. Hold thy peace, thon knave, knight? I shall be and make him a common recreation, do not think, ! constrained in't to call thee knave, knight.
have wit enough to lie straight in my bed: I know, I Sir And, 'Tis not the first time I have constrain'd one can do it. to call me knave. Begin , fool; it begins, Holdthy Sir To. Possess 113, possess us ; tell us something peace!
of him! Clo. I shall never begin, if I hold my peace,
Mar. Marry, sir, sometimes lie is a kind of Puritan. Sir And. Good, i'faith! Come, begin!
Sir And. o, if I thought that, I'd beat him like a dog? [They sing a catch. Sir To. What, for being a Puritan? thy exquisite Enter Maria.
reason, dear knight. Mar. What a catterwauling do you keep here! Ifmy Sir And. I have no exquisite reason for't, but I have lady have not called up her steward, Malvolio, and bid reason good enough. him turn you out of doors, never trust me!
Mar. The devil a Puritan that he is, or any thing Sir To. My lady's a Cataian, we are politicians; Mal- constantly ont a time-pleaser; an affectioned ass, that volio's a Peg-a-Ramsey, and Three merry men be we. cons state without book, and utters it by great swarths: Am not I consanguineous? am I not of her blood ? Til-he best persuaded of himself, so crammed, as he ley-valley,lady! There dwelt a man in Babylon, lady, thinhs, with excellencies, that it is his ground of faith, lady!
[Singing, that all, that look on him, love him; and on that vice Clo. Beshrew me, the knight's ir admirable fooling in him will my revenge find notable cause to work. . Sir And. Ay, he does well enough, if he be disposed, Sir To. What wilt thou do? and so do I too; he does it with a better grace, but I do Mar. I will drop in his way some obscure epistles of it more natural.
love; wherein, by the colour of his beard, the shape Sir To. O, the twelfth day of December,—(Singing. of his leg, the manner of his gait, the expressure of Mar. For the love o' God, peace!
his eye, forehead, and complexion, he shall find liimEnter Malvor10.
self most feelingly personated : I can write very like Mal. My masters, are you mad? or what are you? my lady, your niece; an a forgotten matter we can Have you no wit, manners, nor honesty, but to gabble hardly make distinction of our hands. like tinkers at this time of night? Do ye make an ale Sir To. Excellent! I smell a device. house of my lady's house, that ye squeak out your co Sir And. I hav't in my nose too. ziers' catches without any mitigation or remorse of Sir To. He shall think, by the letters that thou wilt. Foice? Is there no respect of place, persons, nor tinre, drop, that they come from my niece, and that she is in
love with hiin. Sir To. We did keep time, sir, in our catches. Mar. My purpose is, indeed, a horse of that colour.
Sir And. And your horse now would make him an ass. Mal. Sir Toby, I must be round with you. My lady Mar, Ass, Idombt not. bade me tell you, that, though she harbours you as her Sir And. O, 't will be admirable ! kinsman, she's nothing allied to your disorders. FF Mar. Sport royal
, I warrant you! Iknow, my phyyou can separate yourself and your misdemeanours, sic will work with him. I will plant you two, andlet you are welcome to the house; if not, an it would the fool make a third, where he shall find the letter;