CHAPTER XI.

RETRIBUTION.

"Going before to judgment."

I HAVE hesitated whether to insert this chapter. It is not my design to speak of the future judgment. That there will be righteous discrimination and awards of character in eternity, is one of the plainest doctrines of revelation, and one of the first and most essential principles of moral government. But it would occupy too much space here to introduce that subject; and besides, it belongs more properly to the pulpit and to theological works. I think, however, my reader will not deem it irrelevent to the nature and design of this work, if I introduce a short chapter touching the retributions of sin, as they sometimes begin to manifest themselves before the close of this life.

I do this for the following reason. There is a sentiment lurking in many minds whose moral discriminations are not quick and keen, that although there may be some inconvenience attending sin, after all we exaggerate its evils-that the way

of transgressors is about as easy and pleasant as the way of the obedient, at least to those who choose it, and that for aught that appears, the righteous and the wicked may be presumed to fare nearly alike in the end.

It seems to have been for the admonition of such, that the inspired pen wrote, "Some men's sins are open beforehand, going before to judgment; and some men they follow after." That is, sometimes sin begins to be overtaken with retributions in the present world, enough at least to illustrate the fact, that we are under a righteous moral government. They seem to anticipate the retributions of eternity. Many are so sceptical in regard to what lies beyond the grave, that God sometimes brings the judgment in a measure over to this side of it. For the same reason that he sometimes brings a portion of the very joys of Heaven into the soul of a dying Christian, that he may thereby encourage the good in the way of obedience, he also sometimes brings a portion of the very woes of perdition into the soul of the dying sinner, that he may thereby persuade the wicked to

turn.

As an illustration of this, I have concluded after much hesitation, to state the particulars of a case which fell under my own observation. I shall state the facts as they occurred, without any exaggeration or embellishment.

A MELANCHOLY FACT.

253

A young man left his father's house in the country, at the age of fifteen. He had a pious mother, and had been the subject of early religious instructions and impressions. After he began to reside in the city, according to his parent's directions he attended for awhile upon the faithful preaching of the gospel, and was of hopeful habits. He however, kept himself aloof from the more personal and special means of religion, yet still believing it to be important, and designing to attend to it at a future time. He formed an acquaintance with associates less favorable to religion, with whom his feelings gradually learned to sympathise. He went on in this way some four or five years without much obvious change; though he was of course resisting convictions, hardening his heart, grieving the Spirit of God, and laying the foundation of his moral ruin. He often received letters from his mother, reminding him of his duty, and urging him to it, over some of which he was constrained to drop a tear and make good resolutions.

But the way of his heart was steadily backward from God. Every month hardened him the more in impiety. He at length began to give rather free indulgence to the theatre, and to other dissipating amusements and pleasures. His place in the house of God was sometimes vacated, especially in the afternoon, and he was almost never at the evening religious lectures. His mother's letters he read

with less attention than formerly, for he had begun to think himself a young man of some importance, quite competent to think and judge for himself, without her assistance; that she was a kind and good mother, but did not know so much about the customs of the city and what was most becoming a young man in his situation, as he did himself.

About this time he fell in with some infidel writings. He at first hesitated whether to read them; but as he had attended the infidel meetings once or twice without experiencing any harm, he thought there could be no danger in just seeing what they have to say, especially as it was his principle to examine all sides. He first read; then doubted; then began to be more wise than all his teachers; and at length slid quite over into the yawning gulf! His seat in the church, at first only occasionally deserted, was at length quite forsaken.

He was now prepared for more desperate steps. For certain irregularities and vices, he lost his place of employment; and all know how difficult it is for a young man to obtain a second place, when he has lost the first by improper conduct. He at length succeeded in finding employment, but it was not such as he had lost. It was a much humbler and more menial condition, to which he found himself reduced. His ambition was broken down; he was mortified and discouraged. This subjected him still more to the power of the baser motives.

A MELANCHOLY FACT.

255

To these he continued to yield more and more; losing of course what remained of self-respect, and falling under those severe lashes of self-reproach which, if they do not bring to repentance, drive to more desperate lengths in sin.

I will not detail the sad particulars respecting his subsequent course for four or five years. After several fruitless attempts to retrieve his circumstances, he changed his place of residence, hoping to do better. But his character and his habits went with him. For five years he did not write a single letter to his parents, and according to his statement they did not even know where he was; although they were most of the time only about a hundred and fifty miles distant. But he had determined that neither they nor any of his former acquaintances, should know where he was, or what he was doing.

He attempted to play upon the stage, but could not succeed. He even undertook to be a juggler, but soon found it quite out of his province. He gambled some; but usually lost when he had anything to lose. How he obtained the means of subsistence during those years of profligacy, they can tell who are acquainted with that manner of life better than I can. He wandered from place to place, prodigal, reckless, forlorn, rapidly wasting his health, till he at length came to the condition in which I first saw him.