St. Maur-her mother beauty taught herAnd here—fair Lady Cowper's daughter.
Next-dash to earth the cup of praise,
Resume, proud Muse, thy sober satire, Nor bow thy vow'd, unworldly lays,
To those whom every fool may flatter. Leave, "Ladies Fair!" to be the boast Of guardsmen and the Morning Post; And, with thy light but faithful strain, On-my free satire-sweep again!
Tho' liked the gay the jovial brother
The pensive gave it for the other;
And Jersey, after whose own heart is
The grave,―asked Chang to all her parties,
But only begg'd he would not bring
His vulgar brother, Mr. Ching!
She sent him once a card for Willis's
That pretty pastoral spot, where Phillisses
And Damons dance extremely badly,
Where married dames coquet it sadly-
Where, this the law supreme, and vital,
No sin comes here-without a title.
Where, if a few slight faults, or frailties— Unvirgined maids, and liberal wives,
Breaking dull wedlock's cold and stale ties,The pure Religio Loci shrives,
At least the low commercial route
"The Ladies" piously shut out;
And fierce to trade as any Goth's child,
Preserve the moral air from Rothschild.
But to our theme;-at Almack's now,
When gravely Chang himself presented,
Much did the doormen wonder how
From entering Ching could be prevented.
Ingress 'twas clear they must permit
To Chang, who had his voucher got—
As clear-they must not think of it
For Ching, who certainly had not.
"That way up stairs-no, sir, not you-
"I have a duty, sir, to do—
"No ticket, sir?-I'd rather hang
"Myself, than suffer such a thing!
"I don't prevent you, Mister Chang—
"I can't allow it, Mister Ching."
Grave Chang stood open-mouth'd with stupor,
Gay Ching was choler all, and chatter,
When suddenly sweet Lady Cowper
Came by and reconciled the matter.
For Mirth have all the Lambs affection,
So she took Ching to her protection.
I'm not surprised, I own, (when I
Remember how each other tie
The laws of Ton contrive to sunder,)
That Willis should be lost in wonder,
That flesh and blood should dare refuse,
For once to loosen their alliance,
And vulgar Mistress Nature choose
To set ev'n Almack's at defiance.
We've said in some one of our pages,
That Chang had lately conned our sages.
But most of all the books commanding
His thoughts, was Locke on Understanding;
That great name spoke hard by-he heard-
He turned―enraptured at the word,
And L-k (the handsome Captain) took
For the young author of the book;
Accordingly he strait addrest him
With compliments in thousands prest him—
Swore that no man he so admired,
And humbly where he lived—inquired.
Quoth he," The human mind is found,
"Having in all climes the same faults."
He ceased the Captain looking round,
Saw him whirl'd off into a waltz.
For Ching, who lik'd those giddy dances,
Was now engaged to Lady Frances.
Sweet lady-daughter to Lord Connor,
And fairest of the Maids of Honour.
Meanwhile the smiling Lady Mother
Steps up, ond whispers in her ear,
I hope it is the elder brother,
And not "the Detrimental"-dear!
Away we turn; and tow'rds the space
Where tea and cakes the soul invite--
Lo! meet en masse the vagrant race
The swallows of a single night:
Young men, whose looks and feet contrive
To win one voucher to Almack's;
While dear mamma and sisters drive
Pale guardsmen struggling into ton,
Spruce witlings just brought out by Murray,
And squiresses whose squires are known
To have some votes in Kent or SurreyStiff-staring-starched-about a score, Like carvings, decorate the door.
Alas! what anxious toil has won,
Perchance their fleeting triumph here!
What bitter joy, when all was done,
And entrance granted with a sneer !
But Pride its food from Pain shall borrow;
And those to-night's neglect shall gall, Will fly o'er half the town to-morrow, To boast of Almack's charming ball!
The dance is o'er, and yonder see,
Encircled by a smiling ring,
Sweet Lady Frances sips her tea,
And flirts with Mr. Ching.
Till Lady Connor, from her station
Beside, thus turns the conversation
"Dear! Mr. Ching, that 's very pretty--
Why Moore himself's not half so witty--"How well you know our English dances--"You'll come to us the twenty-second; "You've heard, perhaps, that Lady Frances, "The Duke his best Mazourkist reckoned.--"Music you like-Ah! how divine a
"Thing is that song Fan loves to sing-
"Your property I think's in China,*
"And you're the eldest, Mr. Ching?" "Can Mr. Ching," resumes the lady "Our carriage be of use to you? "I grieve, that we're so full already"We cannot ask your brother too
* Little mistakes in topography are not uncommon in the best educated persons.
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